I think more often than not, the dews from heaven distill upon me while I'm in the shower, ironically enough. Yesterday, as I was rinsing the shampoo out of my hair, I found myself pondering something I had read the previous night about the "Super Mom" complex and how there is absolutely no way to be all things to all people, no matter how badly we wish for it and attempt it. And suddenly I had the thought that trying to be everything for everyone gets us absolutely nowhere. I try to tell myself that going half way in every direction is better than nothing. But this is the truth: "Some of us are so busy that we feel like a cart pulled by a dozen work animals—each straining in a different direction. A lot of energy is expended, but the cart doesn’t go anywhere." - Dieter F. Uchtdorf
And I had this idea run through my head: What if I had a group of friends coming over and I wanted to make them some pie. But I also wanted each of them to be the happiest they could, so I would make sure that they got their favorite pie. A few of them I knew well enough to be certain what their favorite kinds were. One liked banana cream, another preferred berry pie, and a few others liked chocolate mousse and key lime and pecan. But there were a few who I didn't know so well, so I had to guess what they'd like. Maybe peach or apple? And then I have to face reality: I don't have time to make 10 different pies! So what should I do? Well, I could try to please everyone. I could make 2 pies (I have time for that) and combine the flavors- how about a key lime/pecan/peach/chocolate mousse pie? Or a banana cream/berry/rhubarb/apple pie? That sounds disgusting! So in trying to make everyone happy, I don't make a single one person happy! The better thing is to make two plain and simple pies and be content with making a few people extremely happy and knowing that any pie is better than none. So even though my contribution may not be amazing, at least it's better than nothing.
I was standing in the shower and basking in my awesome revelation for quite a while before I realized that it actually applied to me right in that moment. I was having a hard time coping with the day because it was Weston's birthday and I had so many things to do. There were 10 people coming and who knows what all of them were expecting or needing in order to be happy. Maybe one needed my house to be spotless while another needed my yard to be weeded, and yet another needed the food to be absolutely incredibly delicious? And there were a few people coming who I didn't know well.... they probably needed all those things PLUS for me to have a bigger guest bathroom and to look resplendent and to have my children behave perfectly. But... there's reality. I can't clean the whole house, weed the whole yard, and make the perfect meal in just 6 hours, let alone remodel the bathroom!
Then came the biggest revelation of them all. Who did I want to "make a pie" for? All the guests? Because I just realized that if I try to do that, then no one will really like the outcome. Or (gasp!) I could focus on the one person whom they were all coming to celebrate for goodness sakes! How could I have forgotten about Weston in all of that worrying? So I decided as I stepped out of the shower to "make a plain and simple pie" for my Weston, since it was his birthday after all. And I worked hard and stayed focused. I did have a few relapse moments of attempting to cook dinner, entertain children, clean the bathroom, and put make-up on all at once (it didn't sound so crazy in my head while I was attempting it!) But then I'd reign it back in and remember who this was all for. So we did his favorite things: we ate such a yummy dinner, we spent time as a family, we enjoyed a game of croquet with our family and friends, and we sang and ate whoopie pies and ice cream (his two favorites). We also had a filthy garage, a half-swept kitchen, dirty dishes in the sink, and laundry in the washer and dryer. But I had peace because I knew that I was doing the most important thing. And I think I actually succeeded in making one delicious candy bar pie (Weston's favorite)!
